Bernie Sinclaire calls herself a "mommunist."

For nearly two years, the 38-year-old has raised kids with her best friend in their shared Manhattan apartment — and she couldn't recommend the setup more. She and Anabelle Gonzalez, 39, have a household rhythm: they trade off chores, cooking, and doing crafts with their elementary-age children. Better yet, the pair splits bills in one of America's most expensive cities.

"We'll be laughing on the couch, playing with our kids, and dinner is made, and the kitchen is cleaned," Sinclaire told Business Insider. "It's been mind-blowing to be able to just sit and talk. That was not something that I experienced when I was in a relationship, and it was not something I was able to enjoy as much when I was a single mother."

In a city where paychecks are stretched thin and monthly daycare costs rival rent expenses, New Yorkers are pinching pennies. A recent report from the Mayor's Office found that it costs the average family $159,000 to live and raise children in the five boroughs, and that's just for basics like housing and healthcare. Sixty-two percent of all residents — and the vast majority of single-parent households — don't earn enough to meet their cost-of-living threshold. It's hardest for mothers, who are often paid less than men and shoulder more childcare responsibilities.

New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani took office with a mandate to make the city more affordable. He has announced a plan for universal childcare for toddlers and preschoolers, which builds on the existing NYC Public School free 3-K program. Other proposals aim to lower the cost of apartments, buses, and food. It's a big task, especially as the city's housing demand continues to outpace supply.

To make ends meet, Sinclaire and Gonzalez became a dual-income household with a combined $200,000 — and really fun wallpaper.

"This is not the Mojo Dojo Casa House," Sinclaire said, referring to Ken's bachelor pad in the "Barbie" movie. "This is the Barbie Dream House."

'A utopia'

The concept of a "mommune," or commune of moms, has always made sense to Sinclaire. She was raised in Italy by a single parent, and said she watched her mother have to "choose between poverty and partnership." She wanted to avoid being financially dependent on a man.

"That was a dream and a wish from early on: to create a family not centered on male partnership and not centered on romance," she said. "Friendships are way more long-lasting, and it didn't make sense to me to have my children's welfare and financial security hinge on something that data shows over and over again is not really working for most women."

Sinclaire and Gonzalez met at an NYC graduate school in 2013 and stayed in touch when they became mothers. Sinclaire has two sons, ages 4 and 9, and Gonzalez has a 7-year-old daughter. Gonzalez had divorced when Sinclaire pitched moving in together.

"It took me time to process because you don't really hear about that type of alternative family," said Gonzalez, who grew up in Brooklyn. She didn't agree right away. "At first I was like, 'Okay, girlie, I love you, but what are you talking about? Then I cried at the end of the conversation because it sounded like a utopia."

The pair initially settled into Sinclaire's existing two-bedroom apartment, then upgraded to a three-bedroom, two-bathroom Harlem unit costing $4,550 a month. Their monthly rent is roughly $600 higher in the new place, but they say the space is essential as their kids grow. Their two incomes allow them to stay local. In upper Manhattan, about 52% of renter households spend 30% or more of their income on housing, the threshold housing economists typically define as unaffordable.

Both women teach at the same public high school, and said their finances have become more stable since they began sharing costs. Last year, Sinclaire earned $94,278 after deductions and Gonzalez earned $106,952, tax documents reviewed by Business Insider show. They split the $600 monthly grocery bill 50/50, then Gonzalez covers WiFi, and Sinclaire pays the electricity bill.

Childcare is divided, too. Sinclaire's youngest son is now old enough for free 3-K (which saves over $1,000 each month), and the others are in public school. The two moms trade drop-offs, pick-ups, and watching the kids. When there's a gap, they call their part-time caregiver. "She's been with us forever," Sinclaire said. "And we don't have as many hours for her as we did before, but she's our lifeline." Their monthly childcare costs average $600, with Sinclaire paying a larger share because she has two kids.

Since starting the "mommune," Sinclaire said she saves about $1,200 more each month, which goes to her emergency fund, retirement, and kids' college accounts. Gonzalez said they also spend less on takeout and impulse purchases because they can split household responsibilities and avoid burnout — something that wasn't the case in either of their previous relationships. That time and energy savings can't be overstated, she said.

"You want to be honest about your soul and boundaries and your lifestyle up front," Gonzales said. "Talking about money is uncomfortable — and it has been uncomfortable for me and for Bernie because it was the first time we, as friends, were talking about it — but it's important to talk and be honest about money."

'A New Yorker forever'

Gonzalez is the first to wake each morning to start breakfast. "I don't do measurements," she said, but each plate turns out delicious anyway. Sinclaire — a recipe loyalist — prefers cooking dinner.

Their children act like siblings and enjoy playing together, with occasional squabbles. The moms are each other's support system, and treat all three kids like their own.

"I think that if you're blessed to have a big community, you might not see this as something very different," Sinclaire said. "But if you are, like many mothers, 'default parenting,' and you're overwhelmed and you've lost your sense of self, friendship is lifesaving."'

Sharing a life has given the two more space for their creativity. Gonzalez co-owns a clothing brand. Sinclaire has been able to spend more time on art and is turning years of handwritten journals into a book. Saving money has also given the family more resources to travel. They took the kids to Mexico recently and plan to take their "first solo mommy trip" to Turks and Caicos this summer.

The pair hasn't sworn off romance, but they wouldn't trade it for the "mommune."

"A lot of times people are like, 'This is crazy, that you're going to move in with another woman,'" Sinclaire laughed. "And I said, 'How is that more crazy than moving in with a man that you met online and having children with him?'"

"Yes, we do date," Gonzalez added. "But anybody who dates people will understand that you live in your house and I live in mine."

Even when the kids get older and move away, the moms don't think they'll part ways. There are simply too many Jon Hamm TV shows, Cardi B albums, and nightlife spots for them to appreciate together. They see the "mommune" lasting long past their child-rearing years.

Plus, rent isn't getting any cheaper, and neither of them wants to leave NYC.

"I'm a New Yorker forever," Gonzalez said. "I love my city."

• Scott Scovel moved to Miami in his 50s, hoping to benefit from lower taxes and cheaper living costs.
• But those costs didn't make as much of a difference as he anticipated, especially after he retired.
• The biggest benefit of Miami was unexpected — he bought a much cheaper home and retired early.

In 2021, at age 58, I followed one of the hottest relocation trends in the US: I moved from New York to Florida.

I'd accepted a new job in Miami that I intended to be my last, and wanted to see what it would be like to retire in Florida. I was drawn by Miami's warm winters, lower taxes, and supposedly cheaper living, but I also loved New York, so I was torn about where I'd have a better retirement.

Now that I'm here, I love Miami's glorious weather and cultural diversity, but I've only found modest benefits from Florida's lower taxes and living costs when compared to my life in New York.

Miami hasn't met all my expectations, but it surprised me in one very important way, and I'm glad I moved here.

Housing costs were dramatically cheaper in Miami, but they're on the rise

During my first few weeks in Miami, I was lured in by the bike rides I could take through lush parks and along glistening blue waters. In the neighborhood of Brickell, I could enjoy a pedestrian lifestyle similar to Manhattan's. By my sixth month, I was ready to commit to living here permanently, so I called a realtor.

I bought a two-bedroom condo in cash for $727,500, using the money from the $1.65 million sale of my two-bedroom Manhattan condo in 2019. With no mortgage, my monthly expenses fell significantly. I suddenly realized I could afford to retire years earlier than I expected, relying on my savings, so I left full-time work in 2022 at age 60.

I was lucky because I took Manhattan money with me to Miami, after nearly 40 years of working in the financial services industry. For other Americans moving from lower-income areas, the "Miami dream" may not be as affordable. House prices in Florida aren't what they used to be: evidence shows Miami condos cost over twice as much as they did 10 years ago.

Lower taxes and living costs didn't make as much difference as I expected

When I received my first paycheck in Florida, I rejoiced because there's no personal state income tax here. New York State and City taxes cost me nearly $40,000 some years.

Now that I no longer have an income from a job, I'm not benefiting in the same way. Lower taxes initially drew me to Miami, but I hadn't properly considered that this factor would lose significance when my income fell in retirement.

I also assumed everything would be more expensive in NYC than Miami, but I've been struck by how comparable many costs are. I still buy clothes from online retailers and household goods from Amazon, meaning the prices don't fluctuate significantly based on where I am.

My weekly grocery bill is perhaps a little cheaper in Miami, but some things were unexpectedly cheaper in New York, most notably transportation, as the subway system beats having to own a car or pay for Ubers to get around parts of Miami.

Miami has great weather, but it can't beat New York's cultural abundance

I absolutely love the Florida weather. I grew up with four-month winters in Minnesota, and during my first year in Miami, I'd brag to friends up north that I now wear shorts 360 out of 365 days. I worried that the summer heat would get oppressive, but it actually hasn't been that bad. I wake up at dawn to exercise, avoid the midday sun, and reappear outdoors in the cooler evenings.

I like that Miami has a diverse population and is a major hub for Latin American and Caribbean cultures. However, I sometimes miss the broader global culture in New York, where I could effortlessly eat great Thai food just blocks from home, take in an African art exhibit at the Met, or attend a European film festival. Miami can be proud of its restaurant and cultural scene, but almost no city can compare to New York's abundance.

I was shocked housing in Miami was so much cheaper than New York

Though I came to Miami expecting to make significant tax savings and benefit from lower day-to-day expenses, I've found that my retirement living costs are pretty similar to what they would've been in New York.

The biggest benefit, however, was unexpected. I was shocked to learn that Miami housing could be so much cheaper than New York. I bought a comparable condo for less than half the cost of my Manhattan home, which eliminated my need for a mortgage and enabled me to retire early. For that, I'm extremely grateful to Miami.

Retiring early means I'm young enough to fully enjoy my golden years. I bask in the Miami sunshine on walks and bike rides, travel extensively to other countries, and have time to pursue all sorts of hobbies, from improv classes to museum trips.

One of the most enduring myths about Florida's history is that European explorer Ponce de León came here in search of the fountain of youth in the 1500s. I'd like to think I've found my own fountain of youth by retiring early in Miami — something that means more to me than a lower tax rate.

Do you have a story to share about moving to Miami? Contact the editor, Charissa Cheong, at ccheong@businessinsider.com